So hurt over my teacher, im 18 and im sorry if u have heard this all before but please help :(?

Ok im 18 I have just left 6form. I've had an obsessive desire towards my 3O yr old female teacher (im also female) since I was 13. Ive had a routine since then of seeing her everyday. Therefore, not seeing her now is absolutely killing me inside. I am crying constantlly already and it's only been two days! I don't know how to cope. The thing is, I have assumptions she could feel the same as she stares often and sometimes I catch her looking at me with like a depressed look as if she wants me type of thing, or she wants me to see her looking depressed so I know she likes me as she couldn't of said anything. Also, a few times are feet would accidentally touch under ttthe table. But there was one time she could see where my feet where and she knocked my feet with hers, she then paused for ages, stopped talking lost concentration and stared into space for 5seconds atleast, maybe more! I don't know what to think, it could be in my head??? Or she could actually have feelings for me, coz how else would my feelings of grown soo strong. What do you all think? Thanks for your time it means a lot as im slowly breaking and unable to live properly with this knife through my heart. I feel ashamed and some sort of weirdo for being soo obsessed but I cant help these feelings, she's such an amazing woman, even though I don't know her properly/personally. Which I think is a good thing, as if she does feel the same as me building a relationship would be fun and exciting getting to know one another as if we just met